Rishikesh, Inida: my yogic introduction.

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Karen and I woke up around 5:45am on the train northbound from Delhi to Hardwar expecting that our stop would be coming according to the schedule. This being our first train ride in India, me ever, and for her a long time, we were ignorant to the fact that trains are NEVER on time in India. It was probably closer to 8am when the train made its actual stop in Hardwar where we immediately hopped off and headed to the bus station to find our bus leaving for Rishikesh just as we arrived, perfect timing after all!

Upon our arrival we had to walk across the Ganges River on a pedestrian only bridge (not big enough for vehicles larger than a motor bike. We found a room to share at 400 Rps / night. It had an excellent view being directly on the river.

Once settled I set off to search for a place where I could practice yoga for a week, at least that is the length of time I was expecting to spend there. I wanted to put myself into a personally-driven week-long intensive yoga boot-camp. I did not find one that seemed to meet what I was looking for on this venture out.

Rishikesh is a town that borders the Ganges. On the pedestrian only side of the river there are shops, restaurants, guest houses, temples, yoga centers and some private residences, that is about it, all sandwiched between the foothills of the Himalayas and the River. Little tributaries flow throw various parts of the village from the mountains into the river. There are two bridges, one at either end of the pedestrian only side. We walked downstream towards the second bridge, stopping to buy a couple of cotton, multi-coloured yoga mats along the way. A little further down the way we reach the site where the daily Puja‘s are held (daily prayers, typically done around 6am and then 6pm).

The next morning we set out to find a new place to stay as the current place was too expensive for Karen. We found a guest house a little further upstream that was 150Rps / night. A steal! It wasn’t luxurious by any means, but it had everything you needed; squatting toilet, ceiling fan and cold water showers. We liked what we found, and now I really needed to find a place to do some yoga. We went to one place that was a little off the road and waited forever to meet with the teacher, he came out and wasn’t very receptive. His deal was different. He was looking for people to commit to staying at his place and practice/study the yogic life philosophies more so than just asanas (postures). It was awkward and it wasn’t what we were looking for. On the way back we saw a sign for another spot, so we went to check it out.

The classes were held on the roof of a guest house; the roof was actually the second floor that was never completed, so it still had concrete pillars and re-bar extending up into the open sky. The teacher did not live there and only rented the space to hold his practices He was not there at that time, so we started walking back. As we were heading down to the main road a small, old Indian man on a scooter wearing all white, with a white bandana and a white beard came riding towards us and stopped. He says, “Ah ha! I’ve found you!” I laughed. He was very funny, confident and enthusiastic. He was our teacher, he was Swamiji, or as he pronounced it “Som-ji”. He held classes everyday by donation on top of the guest house at 8am and 5pm, with breathing and meditation following the second practice at 6:45pm.

Karen was an Israeli who I met on the flight from Bangkok to Delhi. She was just starting her trip while I was on going into the final 2 of 6 months of my trip, I spent the past 4 months in SE Asia. She was a yoga teacher for kids as well as a school teacher back in Israel, but did not seem to be working at the time she left for her trip. She did not go into too much details about her life back home, I always felt she was kind of traveling to get away from something; a break-up, a lay-off, family issues, etc. I never did find out.

My yoga intensive had begun. Swamiji talked a lot. The practice and postures itself were excruciatingly (at least it felt that way in the beginning) fragmented with various talks and stories by him. He would tell us stories from the Bhagavad Gita and other stories from the Hindu Religion, which at times were interesting. But in the middle of a practice to just stop and sit there while he talked did not feel efficient at all. But in retrospect it kind of seemed like a lesson of patience all on it’s own. The exercises and postures were intense and jolting with a lot of bouncing. Very different from what I experience now. But it felt effective. He would push and pull our bodies in all directions trying to improve out flexibility. At times it was very painful. He are some shot of me fairly early on in my practice with Swamiji:

So for the next 14 days in a row, my schedule was more or less like this:

- wake-up 7:00am, pound as much water as possible, brush teeth and apply a Tiger Balm-like cream to my low back and hamstrings to get them pre-heated for the class. After about the 2nd or 3rd day my body was breaking down a bit. The consistent stretching definitely took it’s toll. Felt very similar to DOMS (Delayed Onset Muscle Soreness)

- walk to class for 8:00am. I cherished the walks because they too acted as a warm-up before we started class. It wasn’t until about the 8th day when the soreness began to subside and I did not need to apply any cream. Here is a video of us doing a part of our warm-up (like I said, it was very different):

- 8:00am – 9:30am we practiced yoga

- 10:00am I would go to “my” juice stand guy and get a freshly squeezed glass of pomegranate juice. It was like a super coffee in terms of the energy I got from it!

- I would walk further up stream after my juice to a place on the river where westerners were permitted to enter the river. Western men were allowed to enter anywhere, but Western women were not if they wanted to just wear a bathing suit. I would go into the cold water to literally ice my body down after practice. It felt just like an ice-bath during two-a-days at football training camp. It literally gave me my legs back and reduced inflammation every where.

- I’d head back to the guest house and have brunch; typically a big bowl of granola, fruit, yogurt and honey. I loved this meal so much. It felt very nourishing and cleansing, usually because I was starving at this point.

- I would spend the early afternoon doing random things: internet/email, reading, writing, exploring the town, napping. I always had to get in a nap before the next class.

- 4:30pm I would re-apply the tiger-balm and get myself ready for the afternoon/evening class. I’d pound water and have some sort of fruit before class.

- 5pm yoga class #2. Typically this class was always much better than the first. My body was already opened up from the morning class and I would see drastic increases in my flexibility in this session. It was unbelievable the differences. He are some shots of me later on near the end of my time there, you can see the improvements:

- 6:45am Breathing and meditation. This was a excellent learning experience for me. It was an introduction into various Pranayama techniques and meditation. I definitely had some interesting personal experiences while meditating. Sometimes it was easy to relax and just Be, other times it was more of a struggle. I remember one such time when a couple days prior my meditation sessions were jagged and challenging, but on this evening I felt very still, very connected and grounded, and any other analogy people use to try and describe a positive meditative experience. And afterwards Swamiji looked at me and said, “Was that better?” I nodded and said, “yes.” I was surprised when he said that. It was like he had some how aided in my experience or sent some sort of positive intentions my way during that session. He taught us to focus inwardly at our 3rd eye and just watch our thoughts as they rolled by, just observe them. Eventually they would slow down and have space between them, spaces of thoughtlessness and conscious presence. At first this was very difficult and frustrating. My thoughts never seemed to stop. They seemed useless, here I was trying to stop them from happening and they would not stop. It was a moment of realization for me, I had never just tried to watch the thoughts and try to get them to stop. “Why would they not just stop?” I remember asking myself this. But with practice, they did begin to slow down. And I would notice spaces between them. But typically as soon as that would happen and I would realize it, I would think, “yes, they’ve stopped!” Then I think, “Damn, I just thought that, and that was a thought” and the thoughts would be off and running again. But like anything, if you practice it you can improve and this was exactly the case with this sort of meditation technique.

**Here is a clip from a part of a story he was telling during one of the meditation sessions. I wish I did not cut off the video when I did, in retrospect, it sounds like a pretty interesting story about the abuse of power / being careful what you wish for. But overall I think it was explaining through metaphor that what you sow is what you reap. One of the many universal laws explained through stories in many religions, this one being Hindu.**

- some nights we would also do the Netty pot, a nasal canal cleansing techinique where water goes in one nostril and out the other:

- after the meditation I would go for a bountiful and nourishing Northern Indian dinner usually of Special Thali. I loved this meal so much. It was always cheap, freshly made and absolutely delicious.

- Dinner would normally be done by 9 or 9:30pm, I would have yet another cold shower, or sometimes pay 20 Rps to have a bucket of water heated for me to have a hot water shower, which were savoured like the last few drops of water given to a person in a desert. I would then either chat with other travelers at the guest house for a bit, read or write and go to bed. I was always so exhausted. Before long the alarm would go on my wrist watch and it was type to lather, rinse and REPEAT.

14 days straight! It was more than double the time I was initially intending to do. I loved the routine. It felt great to just stay put in one place for an extended period of time after being on the move for 4 months. It was nice to unpack my bag and have a daily routine.

I loved my Swami. During my time with him we became very close. He always just called me “Canada”. I can still hear him now as he would comment during my practice, “Good, Canada.” I grew to love his stories. I loved his practice, as torturous and unorthodox as they were they worked. My flexibility reached all-time new heights. I had never been that open before, and to this day, 4 years later I have never regressed to where I was before those 14 days. And he also introduced me to at least one type of meditation technique that definitely helped me see things a little different introspectively. We had a teary-eyed goodbye. He gave me a copy of the Bhagavad Gita with a picture of him inside and a message. We took a few pictures together and said farewell. I told him I would be back one day. And I know I will, I just hope that when I walk to that half-completed guest house I still find it half complete and there he is on top of the second floor, blankets laid out on the concrete waiting for whoever would show up. It was this intensive training 2-weeks, done more or less on a whim, that really got me started into yoga. It has now become a huge part of my daily life and I have learned much about myself, others and I feel it has enhanced my life immeasurably. For that I am grateful.

Here are some random shots from the rest of my time in Rishikesh, the self-proclaimed world capital of yoga. If you ever get the chance to visit, I highly recommend doing so.

Thanks for reading.

My Yoga and Resistance Training Supplementation Reversal

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Based purely upon looking at me when on the street or in the change room, you may find it surprising that I have done resistance training for about 15 years now. I do have musculature but if I said, “think of what a normal healthy adult would look like if they have done 15 years of resistance training and were 29 years old” you probably would not picture my body type. If you saw me perform resistance exercise technique you would see more of my maturity coming through as I do have an extensive back ground as both an academic and as a practitioner. I began resistance training with my purpose to enhance athletic performance. After athletics were done, I never stopped. I had learned of the several health benefits that it can deliver and I always enjoyed how it felt.

Over time as I learned more about my own physicality, I was still content in doing weight training with cardio, thinking I had found an excellent coupling; and I had, but little did I know what I was missing.
I was working for Twist Sport Conditioning in North Vancouver in 2005-2007 during my Masters degree in Human Kinetics at UBC where I was specializing in Sport Conditioning. During one of their summer intensive elite hockey training camps one of my fellow coaches, Arielle Nash, was also a well-established yoga practitioner and teacher. Once a week she would put the boys through a 60 minute yoga routine. I can still remember how stiff I was especially in the downward dog position. I just felt how inflexible I was throughout my entire posterior chain. The sensation was sharp and bitter (note the flavor analogy). I think it wasn’t until after my 2nd sessions with Arielle, while I was lying in the final corpse pose, where I felt how amazingly-warm and flowing my body felt. I look back now and better equate it to the energy of my body simply feeling more liquidus and alive. By the end of that summer my heels were getting closer and closer to the ground in my downward dog, my body was opening up.
I did not continue the practice for about a year and a half until I went through one of the greatest experiences of my life. I did an intensive training personal yoga boot-camp in Rishikesh, India. For 14 days straight I practiced yoga with Swamiji twice a day for 1.5 hours each session followed by about an hours worth of pranayama (breathing exercises) and meditation. My flexibility exploded! But let me be the first to say that I worked hard for every millimeter I gained.

The early stages of my yoga boot-camp with Swamiji.


He was very different from any North American teacher. He would literally pull and push my body into position. Never to hurt me, but to bring me to a new edge each time. It hurt like hell, but it worked for me at the time.


He was very different from any North American teacher. He would literally pull and push my body into position. Never to hurt me, but to bring me to a new edge each time. It hurt like hell, but it worked for me at the time.


This is near the end of my time, much improved posture.

Upon my return I began to consistently incorporate yoga into regular exercise regime. I was doing yoga 2-3 x / week while resistance training 3 x / week. At the time I was working as the Strength and Conditioning coach with the Hamilton Tiger-Cats and I spent the majority of my working hours in a weight-room. I was at one of my personal strongest points in my life. I was doing 2-3 classes of hot yoga regularly. I felt amazing. It felt so balanced. Hot yoga is a great way for anyone to begin getting into yoga in my opinion. Especially if you come from a sporting background and enjoy sweating. Even if you can’t touch your toes to save your life, you will at least feel fantastic after sweating out litres and litres of fluids. With not much time at all, you can see your range of motion increasing; I feel the external heat really helps early on, that is until you learn how to generate that same internal heat doing other forms of yoga with breath-work.

This is when I was basically living in the gym while with the Hamilton Tiger-Cats. I haven't seen this photo in a while. You can see my weight-room behind me.

Hot yoga was such a great compliment to lifting. With all of the contractions and shortening of my muscles I worked so hard on in the weight room, being able to lengthen both muscle and connective tissue in the yoga studio was such a nourishing experience for my body.

I moved West to Vancouver where, after a bit of a hiatus, I joined Yyoga and continued practicing hot yoga. But it wasn’t before long, probably due to a lack of options in a busy schedule, I tried my first Vinyasa-style class. The whole program of it was different; the cueing, the breathing, the flow of the movements, the diversity. I was horrible! I felt stiff again. It gave me the gift of feeling my body from a completely different point of view.

It has been 2.5 years since then and I now find myself the reciprocal of where I was back when I was working with the Tiger-Cats. I now use resistance training to compliment my yoga practice. I weight train 2 x / week, both being full-body workouts, where I focus on remaining strong. However, my focus isn’t about lifting super-heavy weights, but it is all about technique, support, and body-weight control. I do recognize the many health benefits from resistance and load training and I will always practice them to some degree. But the knowledge I have been able to gain through yoga and realizing that it can provide me so much more is why my evolution has progressed towards doing more yoga. I have the greatest flexibility that I can ever remember and it feels great! Not that flexibility is the only thing yoga is amazing for, but as I learned at a workshop a few weeks ago from a yoga practitioner of over 40 years, the first 5 years or so are about gaining true range of motion and flexibility, and I agree. Some people with a background in dance, martial arts or gymnastics may come in with a very high level of flexibility from the start that they have developed or sustained from their past, but for most; we need to address first things first.

I initially stated how yoga made my muscles feel sharp, and bitter; it has evolved over the years to feel less bitter, but more sour. There are things that are so sour that they are not much better at all than being bitter. But you know how sometimes you can kind of crave sour? In the right amounts it can be oddly satisfying, for others very enjoyable. That is where my yoga is currently. In some areas of my body it feels like a tasty sourness. The bitterness has for the most part left. And in areas where I have progressed more, I now experience a more sweet-like sensation during the postures. And rarely, I will even begin to dabble into a realm of savory. I can imagine within time that all postures will feel like a Thanksgiving Day dinner after a half-day fast in anticipation of the big feast. The postures become like succulent pieces of turkey with gravy and cranberry sauce. Like herbed mashed potatoes whipped so fluffy your green peas barely float on top.

I have being saying this for a while now: if I was ever forced to choose one form of exercise to perform for the rest of my life, it would be yoga. I feel overall, it will provide me with the greatest life of functional longevity. It is constantly evolving and there is no end-point. It has had a profound effect on my life and I am grateful to have tried it and to be able to know enough now, that even if I was unable to attend a studio, that I could find a clear space, take off my shirt, close my eyes with my hands in prayer at my chest as I take a slow conscious inhale, holding at the top aaaaaand…

Why I stopped watching T.V.

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WHOAH! What the fuck? Why has it taken me sooo long to get back into my blogging? I have no idea. I’ll blame it on summer, although I know I should be blaming it on myself. There is no real excuse!

But I am back and it feels great. I will continue to blog from here on more consistently. Got to get that habit re-engaged. I think it is something else with the change of seasons as well. I have always liked fall, but it was also always a very stressful time for me back in the days of football. My stress-coping capabilities throughout my career were non-existent which I do attribute partially to some of the bumps in the road. If only I knew then what I knew now about sport psychology perhaps things would have been different. But then again, with out those lessons and experiences, I may not be the person I am NOW; whether I was aware of it or not, those days taught me a lot.

I digress! This blog entry is not about reminiscing of the “glory days” of football. I wanted to touch on something that has had a gargantuan impact in my life for the past 1.25 years.

I cancelled my cable TV.

In fact, technically, I still have cable as it is included with my strata fees of my condo. Regardless, I dropped off my PVR and everything to Shaw and now I just have the slightly dated flat screen sitting where it always has slightly crooked in the space above my fireplace because the original design of the mantel area was for one of those ancient big screen TV’s with the super deep back. I could still watch the basic digital cable if I just plugged everything in, but I have simply chosen not to.

It was relatively early last summer when I was lying on my couch after work around 7pm or so and as I was flicking around aimlessly I realized how gorgeous of a day it was outside. I wasn’t watching a thing and yet there I was just lying there. It really hit me hard, “this is not a significant way to be spending my life time”. I was sucked into the sounds, the images, the programming and 95% of it meant nothing to me. The way I phrased it myself was “I don’t think I will be lying on my death bed saying do you remember that show, or that game, or this or that or this or that…”. I knew this would not happen.

It was a little bit of a evaluation or maybe better put re-valuation of my time. Instead of living passively through the programming, allowing my mind, conscious and subconscious, to be subjected to everything no matter how excellent or poor it is; I decided to live more actively. I did not want to listen to it any more. I had had enough, I was sick of it. Being subjected to hours upon hours of commercials. Having to hear whatever the program decided to put out there. I was sick of it all. And I know many of you are probably saying just use your PVR more effectively, or just watch what you want to watch. But this still does not seem like a great use of my time. Sitting passively and watching a screen. The screen is not real life. It disconnects you and desensitizes you from your body and mind during the present moment, which, in my mind, is taking me away from where I want to be more often and in which I also put a lot of effort towards through other personal practices in my life (yoga, meditating in the float tank, working out, or going for a walk, or having a conversation with somebody, or learning something of interest).

I feel that most of the language (word choice, intentions, view points, etc.) are detrimental to my mind. They are often fear-based, negative, criticizing, over-analyzing, limiting, self-depreciating, and comparative. I know not all are like this, but much of it felt this way to me. It was not enhancing my mental capacities. It was subjecting me to images that were built up to give the impression that things were unobtainable. I feel that much of the programming is geared towards keeping the mass population entertained, disengaged, intimidated, and simply by watching it does not let people exercise their “creativity muscles” for themselves. To be really blunt about it, for me, it did not feel healthy. It did not feel healthy for my mind, body and soul (which is all of the same anyways).

OK, lets address some of your rebuttals, because I am aware of some of them, and I agree with them too. First off, I will confess, I still watch the odd show/series online. To be specific, I’ll watch Survivor when a new season is on and TUF (The Ultimate Fighter). That’s basically it. I will watch the odd movie. I do watch documentaries, youtube, and other video sites. But it is not nearly the same as plopping down on a couch every day. The advertising is not as prevalent, although it is catching up on the internet. But more importantly the internet is a two-way street. I can actually respond and better choose what I subject my mind to. It is more engaging overall.

I’ve simply filled the time that I have re-claimed with doing more of the things I enjoy. More yoga, more reading, more time with my girlfriend (thankfully she has never really watched TV, aren’t we just two self-righteous peas in a pod! :P ), more work, and personal learning in general. I literally don’t see how I would ever want it back in my life. I realize this is just me and everyone is different and I am not judging you if you do watch TV. I am just telling you my opinion of things and my approach to it all and what seems to be working well for me. I really don’t miss it at all. I am not trying to encourage you to quit watching either. But at least pay very close attention to everything you watch. See if any of your belief systems are limiting in anyway towards yourself, and then see if you can identify any similarities between a limiting belief you may have and what you are habitually viewing on TV. If you do watch TV, be sure it is enhancing you in some way. If so, in any way, GREAT! Then it is serving you. For me, they lost me, I have left and I don’t see myself going back.

Hope everyone is well and if I haven’t spoken to you in a while say Hi.

Thanks for reading!

Love Culture

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I was in the tank yesterday. It was one of my intentionally optimized floats where I time my float during my prime floating time (3-9pm), after a workout (it was an epic sweaty lift in the green house effect of fitness world in North Van where they have a glass-roofed weight area directly next to a swimming pool… the humidity gets a little gnarly at times, but I love it!), and before I have ingested anything substantial. Digestion takes a lot of energy and blood so I don’t like to have such a gross concentration of blood in and around my intestines when I am floating. It wasn’t the longest of floats just because I wanted to get out and see a movie afterwards, but it could have been. I was so relaxed, alert, and just soaking it in the whole time. My body felt zero stress and tension, and I felt amazing, vibrant, and healing energy just super-permeate my whole body; internally, externally, top to bottom. It feels incredibly therapeutic and rejuvenating.

The tank is the best place for thinking. The mind seems to be at its most creative when it is relaxed yet alert, minimal distractions, quiet, etc. The environment generated by the sensory deprivation tank allows me to be alone with my thoughts. Yesterday, I was exploring the spaces between my thoughts, I was trying to get to the root of thought. I was “trying” to witness the space from where a thought arises. I write “trying” with quotation marks because I find it is not really accurate in regards to the fact that trying seems to imply an effort. I find with the tank, trying to do anything takes away from the experience. It is best not to try to do anything. Just be there, with yourself, calmly, alertly, and sink deeper and deeper into simply being.
By “trying” to see where thought arises, I felt I was able to experience the creative force in it’s infancy on the physical plane. A thought arriving from “nothing”. At least that is what it seems like. It could just be the firing of my neurons in different sequences to deliver this thought into words; but what is causing those synapses to fire, and in that sequence? Is it stemming from my subconscious mind, which is what exactly again? All these questions, well I am not going to try and pretend I know the answers. Some have a more scientific explanation, others a more spiritual one, me I feel a more hybridization of the two I suppose; but that is going away from what I am getting at anyways, so lets just leave that a mystery to me and move on. Regardless as to how, why, and what; thinking in the tank is fantastic. It takes time to get better at it, and yesterday was one of my better ones for sure.

So what was I thinking about? Well, I have started really getting into and developing my visualization skills while in the tank. I still have a long way to go before I would consider myself good at them, but nevertheless it is an impressive process. I was visualizing a future business endeavor that I think I want to pursue some day. And I started to think, what makes a service-based business special? What makes people super-fanatical to it, super loyal? One answer I came up with that took me on a tangent was Culture. The culture of a business, the culture that the customer wants to identify with and be asscociated with is a very powerful tool. But for the culture to truly be effective it has to be legit. It can’t fake something. It has to embody what it is trying to represent. I think that is a part of the definition of culture anyways, authenticity seems to be in there somewhere. I tried to define culture to myself. I came up with this:

Culture: the representation (manifestation, mirroring) of human energy. Human energy is universal energy that is chanelled through humans. This idea has humans as a part of a greater whole, acting as a conduit that also has a historical/creative impact upon the energy as well. For example, an artist creates a painting that is abstract and is his/her interpretation of beauty; and for us to look at it we very may well see it as beauty. Another artist could do the same thing and create a painting that is, again, his/her interpretation of beauty. But the chance of these two paintings being the same are impossible. The point of this example is to show that universal energy of “beauty” can flow through each human conduit, but come out completely different due to the additional creativity factors of the conduit itself. Which kind of leads me to a new personal explanation to stop distinguishing a separation of the human conduit (us!) and the universe. There is no separation. No distinction between human and channelling force, we are the channelling force, we are the force period. AHHH, again, I digress.

Culture seems to be the representation of human energy. Everything we see, read, hear, etc. that is created by a human is a part of human culture.

In light of the recent riots in Vancouver this past week, I started to think, “what culture is that?” What culture are we, as a society, currently representing? What is the form that the universal energy we are putting out taking? How are we being represented by our culture? I think it varies from country to country, and then even within a country, in it’s communities as well. Various groups of humans are representing their states in different ways all the time. But there are no doubt common themes that could be identified between cultures all over the world. Themes of love, art, technology, business, agriculture, entertainment, etc. And these themes are also all represented in one way or another within culture. The themes of the riots that was represented by the people that chose to participate seems to be aggression, ignorance, stupidity, a lack of connectivity, a lack of respect (which I feel stems from a lack of self-respect).

Then I started thinking, does culture evolve? It seems to change for sure, it evolves in that it changes. But evolution also seems to imply some sort of improvement. In looking at evolution from this perspective, being a more efficient or adapted perspective, culture does seem to be evolving. With the world being at it’s highest population being more interconnected than ever before physically with various commonalities and communities arising from groups of people who do not even live relatively close together. Cultures seem to be evolving. And if they are, then are they evolving to be “better”, to be more efficient, more sustainable? I’d like to think so, but it is nearly impossible to really tell. Regardless, I went on thinking, “well, where do I think our culture is or should evolve too in order to improve, be more efficient, to help in aiding to our species survival on this planet?” I came up with this; a Love Culture. OK, look, I’m not a hippy. I am not saying love culture in that sense directly, so lets throw out that initial image of flowers, and weird circular spectacles, long hair, un-shapely dresses, and large music festivals.

There seems to be several adjectives that are derivatives of love or a love culture. Here is a list that I came up with that seemed to define a Love culture to me in no particular order:

Honour
Respect
Forgiveness
Humility
Gratitude
Enthusiasm
Fascination
Discovery
Innovation
Creativity
Challenges
Laughter
Honesty
Burdenless-ness
Joyful
Quiet
Comfortable
Secure
Confident
Generous
Sexual
Nurturing
Teaching
Listening
Appreciative
Helpful
Sustainable
Resourceful
Togetherness
Cooperation
Compromise

This list is not by any means all-inclusive or concrete. I just felt that a culture that gave importance, and energy to be expressed or applied through these themes would be a Love Culture. We see elements of this Love Culture all the time, it exists. But it also exists with several other cultures that may not be our most prestigious moments as human beings. Do I think a world can ever exist where this is the only culture that exists, maybe, but probably not. I think there will always be the other cultures around. However, I do think that this Love culture is growing. I think that it can become the predominant culture. I think it needs to be if we want to continue our species survival. We know that the current cultural society will eventually have to change one way or another because it is not sustainable. However and whenever that happens is not what I want to discuss now. But I think the more the Love Culture I described above grows and becomes a part of more and more communities around the world the better our existence will be.

Thanks for reading.

Thanks

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I just had the sudden urge to write. I wanted to just write some things I am thankful for.

I want to thank all of the people in my life. All of those I work with everyday, you work so hard, you care about what you do and you do so with a great attitude. I wake up each day and thank you in my head before I roll out of bed, because I know some have been at work for a couple hours already, and others had been working all night. Without these people our business would not be possible.
I want to thank my family. I am proud to be related to each one of you in one form or another. Despite some some hiccups along the way we do have a common goal, that is just to hope that each other one of us has a happy life. Our health will alter, we will come and go, but if we have some happy moments together, then that is all we can really ask for.
My friends, you bring so much joy into my life. You make me think, you make me laugh, you make me cry. You get me drunk when I shouldn’t, I hate it and love it at the same time.
And for my girlfriend right now, she lights up my day. I get excited every time I get to see her even when we literally are doing nothing… it’s the best. It is great to have someone you can talk to who won’t judge you, who will support you, who will reciprocate the love I have to give, thank you.

I am so thankful for my health. I know there are a lot of people who may have some ill health in one form or another. To you I hope that you have support, I hope that you stay strong mentally, emotionally, and can find acceptance and grace with whatever you are dealing with. Still making the most of your life experience no matter what. Also, for my mental health. There are things that I always need to work on, and practice, but I have been raised with a lot of good intentions I feel, and whether they serve me now or not at least the derivative of them was intentionally good.

Our great nation, there is always something to complain about I suppose, and we always hear of different things. But really, Canada is the best place to live, I realize that. We have so many natural resources, we have an amazing education system, health care, infrastructure. We can always do better, we can always improve, but we are already at such a high platform compared to the majority of the world. I am very thankful to have been born here.

The day and age we live in, we have relative freedom. Again, arguments could always be made, but we have a lot of free-will still. The living experience can be taken in any direction we want or are capable of, good or bad. We may be punished for our actions, but we can still do them. SO in that I am thankful for both the good decisions I have made as well as the bad ones, and I hope that in the future I simply make decisions, good and bad. I’m not going to be unrealistic and say that each decision I make from here on out are all going to be “good”, although I will try, it simply will not happen. But I will learn and grow from the bad ones, I will move on and live past them… I was going to write “live with them”, but I kind of like live past them, as this still takes into account that they happened, but it will not have any power over me in the future, at least from a hindering point of view.

I am thankful for the lifestyle I have; shelter, food, energy, etc. But feel obligated in each facet to improve upon them if I can. Not being ignorant to things; if I can make a more sustainable choice (which one usually can) I will try to do it.

I could go on and on, but I just felt I like I needed to get this out of me. Thanks to everyone who has impacted me, thanks to the earth for providing, and thanks to the universe for manifesting my physical reality. For some reason I am here now, living, and it is an unbelievable and fascinating experience this living experience is. Hoping to many more, but grateful for what I have had.

Thank you all.

Love.

Oh and I am thankful for this delicious golden-tip tea I am drinking right now… this stuff cost me like $30/100g even in it’s home country of Sri Lanka… but dammit, it is amazing, so clean, so pure, so delicious white-tea…. my god, thank you golden-tip! I wish I could share a cup of it with you all right now.

Oh and I am super thankful for my float tank, it has brought some amazing people into my life and it has given me a glimpse into a very healthy future… thank you float tank!

Committing to Happiness

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The idea of being happy literally means something different to everyone else. I have revisited my own philosophies on being a happy human recently and have to come to a couple personal realizations about it. The main realization is that being happy takes a lot of work! Various research and literature state a seemingly endless list of variables that affect ones happiness. Some of these variables are physical health, mental health, ones social life, inter-personal relationships, economic status, geography, profession, diet, and the all-encompassing realm of spirituality, etc. just to name a few. All of these areas of life seem to contribute something in one way or another towards my personal happiness. Giving conscious thought and applying focused/directed energy towards these variables with the constant questioning of why I am doing something is an on-going process in my life.

But really, this takes a huge amount of commitment on my behalf. I exercise very regularly and it is mostly because I simply “feel” better when I do. The natural endorphins (endogenous morphine) that get released with various types of activities play a huge role with my happiness. By doing some sort of activity nearly everyday I pump up these natural highs constantly. Not everyday entails an intense workout, but many days do. And logically, with greater (yet still healthy) levels of intensity comes greater highs that seem to linger for well over a day. And what goes hand in hand with intense exercise is “intense” relaxation / recovery. I find the isolation tank being the ultimate (www.floatvancouver.com) natural method of inducing an intense relaxation response within the body.

The relaxation response is associated with the reduction of stress hormones (epinephrine, norepinephrine, cortisol), a decrease in muscle tension, a decrease in blood pressure, heart rate, ventilation rate; and increase in endorphins / enkalphins / serotonin, increased circulation which contributes to greater nutrient transportation and waste-product elimination, enhanced physical recovery, the balancing of the brains hemispheres on a frequency level. Your body simply feels amazing. When the body feels amazing it is much more likely that the mind will feel amazing too. You literally work your way into a happier more peaceful state. Various foods can enhance your feelings of vitality as well. Compare ingesting a fresh, healthy, nutrient dense green-salad of some sort with lean and clean protein and adequate hydration to a heavy, greasy, highly-preserved, nutrient-poor meal with too much alcohol; the bodily machine will operate in correlation to the fuel it is given. When you eat well, your thinking is clearer, your problem solving is better, and creativity seems to be enhanced as well, on average. Having the energy needed to carry yourself in a positive, upbeat, enthusiastic state is a huge part of being happy.

Awareness and monitoring of ones mental states in an ongoing and slippery venture. It is so easy to slip into some sort of negative state (anxiety, nervousness, boredom, impatience, sadness, jealousy, irritability, anger, etc.), some states being a lot more subtle than others, and you can not even realize you are in them. Whenever I am in an even slightly, subtle negative state, I practice recognizing it as quickly as possible and then begin digging to see where the negativity is being derived from, at least in a way that I can see. Often times it stems from something that is completely illogical and I can logically overcome it. Other times I cannot recognize a definitive root and so I direct my energy towards something that I know will alter how I feel such as exercising, socializing, personal growth/learning practice (e.g. this blog, floating, etc.), and I am usually able to get out of the funk.

Happiness literally is a daily practice indirectly it seems to me. And everything seems to affect everything else. The interconnectedness of all of the above mentioned variables seem to only get stronger with the greater awareness of each area. It seems more likely to me that being happy in one area of my life and not in another still equates to an overall unhappy state. For example, being happy with my family and unhappy with my profession will still produce a Mike that is ultimately at a lower level of happiness than if I was happy/satisfied with both. Unsatisfaction / unhappiness seems to spread from one area of life into others. It will grow and multiply if it is not addressed and brought into awareness which is why it is so important to check-in with yourself as objectively as possible as often as possible and on as subtle of a level as possible.

Things can get even more interesting when you look into being happy in a relationship. Now, although I do believe that each person is personally responsible for their personal happiness, both parties in the relationship require attention, care and energy towards the goal of being happy within the relationship. If one party is consciously or unconsciously relying on the other party to make them happy within the relationship that simply will not happen. Each party needs to be equally committed to creating a happy relationship and take proactive steps towards making that happen. Otherwise, over time what was perceived as happiness can easily fade and disappear, leaving the two members of the relationship feeling lost within it. This takes work, effort and energy in a directed, thought-out manner performed constantly. I think the more compatible two people are may mask the effort/energy a bit as it does not even feel like work, but regardless, the energy is still there and it is efficient and directed. I think when people are not aware of this aspect of a relationship they definitely have a high risk of being unsatisfied with the relationship in the long-run and typically a lot of suffering can occur as a result.

I think some people view happiness in a near mystical type view, like it is a special intangible thing that is just sort of there some times and other times not. A view like this will not command the personal responsible or cultivate the energy and focus needed to create a happy life. I also think people believe they are happy whenever they acquire or possess something as opposed to being or becoming something. True happiness seems to stem more from being and becoming. The endless list of cliches that hint towards this seem to inherently contain some form of truth no matter how over-used or mis-used it is, e.g. “live each day as it was your last”, “live in the moment”, “its not the destination but the journey”, etc. Yes, we have heard these all too many times, but there is truth within in them in regards to happiness I believe. But most importantly it is one thing to just say them generically in a superficial conversation, and it is another to truly practice them. That is where the effort comes in. The on-going commitment, the daily habits forged with as much awareness as possible is this effort in action. The far too often used word of “balance” again carries a huge amount of truth in it. Spanning the universe from mirco-levels to macro-levels, balance is a constant theme; and applies to our human existence superbly. Balancing all of the areas of your life with attention, care, energy, focus, effort and relaxation/recovery seems to be a huge part in generating what I perceive to be happiness.

Thanks for reading.

Practice Dying

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This blog could get messy.  As I am starting out I have an idea of where I want to go with it, but it could evolve into something very different from what I am originally intending.  As well, I think it could be a little controversial to some and unsettling.  With that fore-warning, lets get started.  Lets dive into why I think it is an important idea to practice dying.

Before I even conceptualized this concept, I cannot say I have ever had a personal near death experience (NDE) either physically or psychologically; spiritually speaking, well that is up for discussion and interpretation and we will get into that later on.  I do recognize that having such an experience could completely re-organize my views and opinions of this.  I have had some potentially close calls as I am sure most people have in one way or another in regards to a potential traffic accident, doing something daring and stupid, or just being in a situation that is simply dangerous or bad timing.

I feel that a lot of power the ego generates is ultimately through it’s knowing that it will die one day.  We will die one day, this is a fact.  One of the surest things that we know in this physical world.  One day your physical body will die, and with that potentially all that you are will cease to exist forever.  Nobody knows what will happen when we die, and no one has ever known.  The question has tried to be answered by all major civilizations and religions over the history of humanity.  The very real and true fact that YOU will not exist one day can be a hard pill to swallow for some.  To sit down and actually put yourself into the position (hopefully years down the road) where you are on your death bed and you know this is going to happen soon, is a very scary and unsettling thing to do for many people.  It is easy to gloss over it, and just say, “yes, ofcourse I will die one day”, and not really internalize it, but I believe it can be a great opportunity of empowerment, humility, gratitude and graciousness.

The very idea that death is scary is something to look at first.  Scary to what, to whom?  It is only really scary to your ego.  The ego is generating this fear.  There are some philosophies that state all fear ultimately stems from the fear of death.  The ego never wants to be hurt, betrayed, insulted, or die.  The ego may form the idea of whether an action towards oneself is perceived as good or bad.  Is it attacking me, hurting me, complimenting me, supporting me?  It could be argued that nothing in this world is neither good or bad, it just is.  And it is the mind, the individual that labels something as good or bad.  Same is true about death.  We know that it is inevitable, all things die.  All things are in a state of growth or decay.  Everything seems to be impermanent.   Then why do we have such a hard time accepting this truth when really it may be the only truth we know.

I went through a phase of watering down various things that intimidated me by stating, “we are all dead anyways, so what does it matter?”  I did not mean this in an uncaring and demonic way.  More so in a way to simply take away the fear and realize that in 100 years from now none of these people will be here and it will not matter.  I have since moved away from this saying as I think there are better ways to water fear or intimidation down.  But it was around this time when I began to conceptualize the idea of practicing dying.  Before I began focusing specifically on the practice, I would have various personal experiences when I would be lying in a shivasana position (corpse pose) after a yoga class and develop the thoughts and feelings of “it’s OK if I left now, I could go right now, take me, I can go.”  I felt a strong sense of peace and appreciation with and for the life I have lived.  And if I had to go at that moment, I could.  I felt fine with it.  Naturally, this is assuming my death would be a peaceful departure from this existence.  I could only imagine that if there was a real and sudden cause to my death such as a wound, that it would be a different scenario altogether.  But for the situation at hand and the mindset I was in, I came to what felt like a peaceful conscious acknowledgement that I could accept dying.  I would feel the sensation of being drawn upwards and out of my body.  Like I would be sucked away.  I am sure at a subconscious level within my reptilian brain all was registering fine with my vital signs so none of my fight or flight reactions kicked in, I can only assume that the sensations I was developing were generated by my contemporary brain section (neocortex).

After a few of these experiences I began to make a conscious effort to replicate them whenever I was in a similar state usually generated by either floating in the sensory deprivation tank or a strong shivasana.  Typically, I am in a place of deep relaxation, I feel my inner body very intensely and I begin to think of various things I am truly grateful for; the love and support from my family, the various passions I have been able to pursue throughout my life, the relatively peaceful life I have lived, the adventures I have had, the people I have met, etc.  I come to a realization that I have lived such a privileged life already.  I have done more things than most other people on earth even at my fairly young age would ever do.  Many people die without even experiencing a fraction of the things that I have.  I am so intensely connected with this gratitude, the relaxation and the peacefulness that I really feel like it is OK to go.  I am ready, if I had to leave now I could.  This is where, perhaps, I have experienced a form of spiritual death, maybe temporarily blocking out or killing the ego enough to feel for that moment it is OK to go.

By practicing dying there are two things that could come from this sort of experience that may benefit me:

1) Depending on how I will die, I hope that it is in a peaceful manner, perhaps this sort of death practice could bring a familiarity for me when the actual time comes.  I was told a story by a yoga teacher I had recently in Sri Lanka, summer 2010, that really inspired me.  He described the scenario of how his father died.  The father and the family all knew it was coming, and on one day while on his deathbed, the father called the family in, told them each an individual goodbye, and embraced them all.  He told them that he was going to go now, and he simply closed his eyes and died.  This story had a very inspirational affect on me.  I was like, “that is how I want to die.”  I want to die when I choose to, surrounded by those I love and in a peaceful manner.  It seemed as though he knew he was at the end, he was very aware, and he decided to end it in a peaceful manner on his terms.  I truly thought this was beautiful.  There seemed to be no fear, just a complete acceptance.  I like to think that by practicing coming to this place of peace, relaxation, love and acceptance that when the time comes I too will have the power to end it on my terms.

2) The practice of practicing dying has also generated within me a powerful living aspirational force.  The cliche; live as this day is your last, could be how you could also word this.  By getting myself to acknowledge and practice my own death actually empowers me to live MORE.  To not hesitate, to love as much as I can, to create, to learn, to experience anything and everything when the opportunity presents itself.  I think that by practicing dying that it forces me to keep that “big picture” perspective in mind as much as possible.  Not letting insignificant things rattle me so much.  Any day could be your last, so make sure you are doing the things you want to do.  That is why I feel the introspective process is so important.  Knowing more about myself and defining my priorities will help me do the things each day that I want to do and be in a positive frame of mind while I do the things I do.

I don’t think there is any right or wrong way to practice dying, and I don’t know if it is a necessarily a good thing for everyone to do.  But for me it feels good and I like the way I feel after I do it.  And don’t get me wrong, if I am ever in a life or death situation I have way to much love and respect for this living experience to just give up.  I want to be here, I want to live, I want to love, and help.  But if you are ever in a peaceful state, in silence, feeling tons of gratitude, then maybe try really internalizing that you will not be here one day and make a peace with it.  Let yourself go, have the control.  It is going to happen one day, but if there is anything I have learned the more we do something the less novel it becomes… maybe the once in a lifetime experience of death will be a little more familiar.

Thanks for reading.  You are amazing and deserve everything you want.

“Love was the baseline” Floating Blog: Wednesday March 16, 2011

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I was originally preparing a blog entry that was going to focus on “practicing dying”, then I had a very unique and interesting float last Wednesday that took precedent and I wanted to write about it first.  The “Practice dying” blog will have to wait for now.

I am beginning to find the various criteria that set me up, potentially, for a more “effective” float.  I know that the things that are going on in your life; what happened that day, your emotional state, your current stress levels, time of day, dietary habits and timing of food ingestion, etc. all have an effect on the float you have.  Knowing this, and from various learnings in the past, I have begun to put together some guidelines that I try to perform to help me optimize my floats.

In the hours of a day leading up to a float, circumstances permitting, I follow a certain course of themes that I feel are key things in prepping before the float.  First, the time.  I enjoy floating around dusk / early evening depending on the time of year.  Too early I don’t feel I can relax the same way, too late, I don’t feel I can fall asleep at a reasonable time for work the next day because, typically, post-float I feel refreshed, slightly energized, and in a grounded state that I enjoy to use in regards to learning, writing or just thinking as I do other tasks such as cleaning or food prep, etc.   I have also experienced through other meditation practices (mainly Vipassana and yoga) that the greatest depths and effortlessness seem to occur during dusk times.  Various philosophies claim that the energy of the people / animals at that time of day are more relaxed, and that this has an affect across a population.  Thus, I find, it is simply a better time to go inward.

I also like to float post-exercise.  Whether it is weight-training, some sort of cardio work out, or yoga; the ability of my body to move, flush, breathe, sweat, contract and relax, balance and experience the fabulous endorphin release puts me in a prime mental and physical state before I enter the tank.  It clears my mind and releases excess energy.

I don’t like to have much food, if any, in my stomach before I float.  Digestion requires a huge amount of energy and has many other biochemical effects that feel counteractive for floating.  After a meal you can feel sedated and even drowsy, which don’t help in the tank as you seem to continuously be fighting off a sleeping sensation.  On the flip side, I don’t want to feel hunger because I don’t want that to become a distraction.  I find, after exercise, if I have some sort of shake and remain hydrated prior to going into the tank that it works out very well, and then I usually have an excellent experience of cooking a fresh, delicious meal post float.  It becomes very pleasurable and seems to be a little more wholistic or nearly ceremonial in regards to the care and attention I give to making and consuming food.

Ideally I have had the type of day that permits these personal preferences to occur before I float and then I get into the tank.  Last Wednesday I had a very unique and interesting experience.  I came out of the tank and jotted down several pages of notes as the evening went on and I reflected further on what the experience was like.  Here is my account:

I was able to relax quickly into the tank.  The precursors I described above had me in my perceived optimal state.  I felt like I knew before I went into the tank that my state was ideal and that I would be having a great float.  I relaxed quickly, and was able to get to a common and amazing place where my body feels no pain, no tension, no stress.  It feels unified and amazing, just like in an amazing shivassana (corps pose) in yoga.  You feel your body at a very subtle level that can only really be poorly described as energy.  You just feel your body from the inside at a very subtle level and it is very pleasant.  From this point, and I am not sure why I decided to do this, but I began to focus on my heart center (a point I describe personally located in the region slightly behind or inwards of my sternum).  It is more of a “spiritual” anatomical point than anything else.

BTW, I really dislike using the word “spiritual”, but I will use it just for lack of a better word to communicate with.

I focused on my heart center and began to draw from an emotional memory of what I feel in this region when I have those unconditional loving sensations.  The feeling I get when I am in a great and deep appreciative place towards someone or some sort of circumstance in my life (health, experiences, etc.).  I generated this feeling and it began to spread throughout my whole body.  I kept “letting go” on every exhale and that loving sensation simply became more clear and profound.  It felt as if it was as deep as I could go with that feeling.  As I let go more, the feeling did not change, but I did begin to literally feel a connectedness permeating from my body.  It felt very physical.  It was not just an imagination.  I felt suspended.  Like a fly in a spider-web, but the fly was also a part of the spiderweb.  I could feel the support, I felt suspended and held.  I felt like I was completely immersed as well.  The loving feeling that was permeating throughout my entire body was not only within me, but it was the same as the rest of the web.  This is very tricky to try and describe.

To recap, it felt as though I was able to use the loving feeling to get to a baseline level in terms of the subtlety of sensations that I was able to experience.  This baseline level was the level that felt as though it was connected to all the was surrounding me.  I have heard before that god is love and love is god.  If god is a description for the underlying presence of all existence within this universe, it was fascinating that I felt a basal level connectedness to everything through the compassionate, appreciative loving-sensation I generated in my heart.  This sounds so fable, it sounds nearly cliche, and perhaps that is just how I perceived these sensations from all of the conditioning, programming, and learnings that my brain and mind has absorbed from the past and then this is how I articulate it.  Perhaps another person experiencing the exact same sensation would articulate it completely different.  I did not consciously derive this experience.  I simply had the thought to begin generating the loving experience in my heart and then the rest just sort of happened.

I was still very much an isolated consciousness within this multi-directional spiderweb that I was a part of and trying to describe.  I, Mike, was still there having this phenomenal experience.  I do have a feeling that I still may be able to “let go” more and the isolated conscious-awareness aspect of “me” would also become merged with that field.  I could lose my sense of Self.  I could cease to exist as a separate awareness.  I have had other tank experiences where this was close to the case.  I was never fully “gone” but it felt very very close.  The essence of me, whatever makes up my personal conscious-awareness felt like it was evaporating.  I felt like there was a threshold point where beyond that point I did not know what was going to happen or if “I” would still exist.

It was a beautiful experience.  The feeling of connectedness was amazing.  It wasn’t like a thought-feeling, it felt very physical.  I physically felt suspended, supported, immersed and completely saturated into this baseline universal solution of “love”.  It sounds so ridiculous, like hippy-bullshit,  I know!  But that is really the best I can do to try and describe it.  If everyone could feel this, I think it would be awesome.  I think people may treat each other much better.  For me it was inspiring.  It makes me wonder more and more about life.  Literally, the more I learn and experience the more confused I get.  I can only imagine that when I am an old man and I continue to learn, grow, and experience that I will be so bliss-fully confused that I will just sit and smile a toothless grin at everyone not being able to form any meaningful language sentence because I would not even know what anything really means any more.  I’m learning more but getting more confused about things all the time, more questions.  But that is OK.  I think I would rather generate more and more questions than not come across any of the questions at all.

I don’t know how to end this thing… so for now on when I don’t know how to end a blog, I will just say something I do know and or could recommend.   So in being completely off topic, I leave you with this recommendation: do yoga…

thanks for reading.

Focus or Diversity??

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I often read, hear, think to myself about this concept of needing to either focus on just a few things in life and maxmize your potential in a specific area, or to learn as much as you can about as many different things, maxmize experiences across the board and possibly cross-pollinate ideas which have at-first-glance zero relationship to one another.
A dichotomy that I can find pros and cons for.  Many “success” books / programs / speakers suggest narrowing down your focus.  I understand this.  If you want your business to succeed you need to invest the time, energy and passion to do so… and hopefully you had a good idea and picked a good location ;) .

I marvel at people who are extremely talented within a craft. I am curious if they get to such a high level that the ease of which they can express themselves through that medium allows for a pure flow of creativity. When someone is in “the zone” it has been said they are on auto-pilot, acting as a conduit for creativity to flow through. But I suppose being a conduit does not necessarily require that you be an elitist at a specific skill / talent. Being a conduit is more about creating a stronger or deeper connection with your creative potential I think. So perhaps being at a higher skill for a specific talent is now a mute point toward creative expression.

But perhaps having a higher talent/skill/expertise in an area is how innovation happens. If everyone was just OK at everything there is to be OK at, then perhaps the evolution of everything would not really progress as rapidly as it has. But then again, whose to say that faster evolution / innovation is necessarily better? The fact that things have progressed, apparently quickly, has allowed for population explosion, exponential consumption, and a society that is unable to replenish that which it is consuming. We are arguably unsustainable at this point, or is un-renewable a better word for now? I don’t know.

Having a general knowledge and competency of many things can open you up to so much. It allows you to meet a greater diversity of people. You become highly skilled at learning new skills.  Maybe that is it! You are an expert learner. You have become exceptionally talented at something, learning!

I enjoy trying so many new things. Going to many different places, and putting myself in novel situations and environments is something I am very attracted to. So perhaps I have gone full circle. The act of becoming knowledgeable / skilled / talented at many different things is really just a single exceptional talent or skill in the ability to learn new things, take chances, being curious.
This is what I am drawn to the most. If there is something I find interesting I dive into it. If I am really into it I spend a lot of accumulated time in it, but by no means would I consider myself an expert. But I could agree with the fact that I am an expert learner, or an expert experiencer, or adventurer.

I still have my marvel and appreciation for those who dedicate so much to one thing. I am sure there are realms of personal growth there that are only achievable by doing such a thing; being able to persevere through stagnant times, finding greater passion for something old, getting into such depth with something that it forces you into this micro-universe where the laws of are not the same as we see at a greater scale.

There is no right or wrong here.  I simply do what I like, try new things.  If I find something so capturing I begin to focus primarily on that then so be it.  But for now, I will go to Subway, and when they ask me what I want on my sandwich I will say, “everything, please!”

Do you got love??

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Fifty People One Question – Ithaca from Jackson Eagan on Vimeo.

This video is fantastic.  I love the production of it.  I love the people.  The video asks 50 people just one identical question: “If you could have the answer to any one question what would you ask?”   I absolutely am drawn to the one fellow’s words, the guy with the long curly hair and the guitar.  He says, “Do you got love?”  He then goes on to say, ” if you walk down the street and there is someone sitting there and they look hungry, are you gonna feed them?… You got to take care of everybody, (pause) good or bad. … I got love, baby.”

I just think this is such a beautiful thing to say.  It literally shakes my core perceptions when I hear it.  It is like having an instant reality check, an injection of appreciation and gratitude combined with a yearning inspiration to help others.  To just feel love and compassion all day towards all people.  To respect everyone.  We all have a special life.  Every single person.  And so many are so far away from love they are literally dying and killing.  They must feel so unloved.  Whether they can even identify it or not.  Wow, that is really saddening to me.  I truly wish that everyone can feel love and compassion for one another.  I wish we can see the true beauty in each and every person.  Everyone’s uniqueness combined with all of our inert similarities is something that literally takes my breath away sometimes.  When I watched this video, I see all these beautiful people who are all different in their own ways, but also seem to have the same purpose.  Everyone wants / needs love, wants to be content and peaceful; and hopefully they know that.

There is honestly no reason for a human to treat another human illy on any level.  Do you got love?  If you have love, if you feel it, if you bleed it, you will be able to permeate it.  Whether the other person is aware of it or not, whether they show any change or not, the fact that you love them will make a positive lift within the world.  It will aid in shifting the consciousness of all humans towards a higher evolved entity.

I ask myself a lot, “what should I be doing with my life, with the time I have here, as limited as it is?”  I want to truly make sure I am trying to live to my highest potential, and to do so I find I have to constantly remind myself what is truly important.  My past programming, my ego, our culture and it’s constant bombardment of mainstream media typically go against or at least distract me from keeping a greater wholisitc perspective on what I feel is truly important to me at this point in time.  I say at this point in time because I strive for continued growth, and I am sure that my perspective will evolve as I do.

We seem to be the centre of our universes.  I am sure most of you reading this can assume I mean not from an egoic point of view.  I mean it in the sense that for as much as we know, we are still viewing and experiencing all of this existence from our consciousness, our centre.  Everything we perceive comes to us through our senses or our subconscious, it may then be interpreted / filtered / processed by our minds and this results in the universe and existence we have.  We can directly affect our universe and need to take responsibility for all of our thoughts, habits, and actions as best we can.  Whilst always keeping in mind a greater, wholistic perspective.   I think if this is done, humanity can progress towards a “better” way of living.  And that is all we can do.  We can try.  We can be honest to ourselves and select how we use our life-energy.  I think the more love and compassion we truly feel inside of us the better.

I wish I can bottle the love I feel when I hear those lines from the video.  But I suppose that is the challenge.  To constantly remind yourself of the things that mean most to you.  To feel those feelings as often as possible.  To make them a concrete part of your nature.  I believe that if I continuously subject myself to the feeling that it will continue to grow within me.  And that is what I will try to do.  I will create tools to help achieve this; quotations visible and/or audible that I see/hear all the time, practice things that can generate that state as well (meditation, floating, yoga, etc.), surround myself with people that make me feel the love as well.

With not knowing really how to wrap this blog up well, I just ask that you watch the video one more time and then ask yourself “Do you got love?”  Then take note of what you feel or think.

Thanks.